Ungrateful Me

I want more!

For me that was such an everyday phrase. I would constantly throw pity parties for myself lamenting my lot: If only my parents were a bit richer. If only they spent a bit more money on me. If only my job paid a bit better… On and on the list goes.

A few weeks ago, I got half of the score for one of the modules. As you can imagine the first thought that came to me again was, if only…

Although I had gotten one of the top grades, there were still people that did better than I did. Rather than being encouraged about the result, my only thought was that it could have been better. God did, after all, say His children will be the head and not tail.

As I thought about this, the Spirit was kind enough to remind me that I was being a brat. I had ignored all that I should be thankful for and only sought more.

I could not help but feel ashamed of myself. But what could I do? It had become my lifestyle. I said a quick prayer asking God to give me a grateful heart and closed the results.

God being God, knew exactly what I needed. Few minutes after that, I opened my devotional for the day. It was titled “Do you want to be wealthy?” On seeing this, I thought it was going to be a lesson about trusting God for us to be blessed with wealth in the physical sense but it was not so.

The key verse was, “Better is little with the fear of the LORD than great treasure and trouble therewith” – Proverbs 15:16 (KJV). The writer talked about how she had been dissatisfied with her not-so-colourful but full wardrobe. The person went to say that at the end of the day, God showed her how ungrateful she had been and that there are so many people in the world that cannot comprehend having as much as she does.

Reading this, all I could see was myself. I am constantly consumed with achieving earthly gains that I forget all I ought to be thankful for, including the salvation of my soul.

I was reminded that all earthly gains are just that, earthly! I can’t take them with me when I leave this world. I saw my sorry state and all I could do was call on Him who is able to renew the heart and the soul. O, that I might have a grateful heart!

 

“For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?”(KJV 16:26 Matthew)

The Little Things

Not too long ago, during a prayer meeting, the pastor from our London church said that he wanted people to briefly testify of the things God had done for them.

Like most testimony services I had been in, I was sure this would take the same classic root – people standing up to say all the unbelievable things God has brought them from. How He delivered them from impossible situations and all those amazing stuff.

But then, outside my expectations, a sister stood up and talked about how she was thankful to God for helping her find the glasses she misplaced months ago. The first thought that came to my head was “Really!? You got up for that?”

I guess I wasn’t the only one in the congregation that felt that way because the “Amen” that followed her story was not as enthusiastic as it normally is after a testimony.

As I sat there feeling somewhat disappointed in her, the Spirit questioned me, ‘Is there any such thing as little favours that are not worth thanking God for?’ I felt ashamed of myself and immediately asked God to forgive me for being unthankful.

On getting home later that day, my younger sister told me she had misplaced her pencil case with little hope of finding it and we both joked that she should ask God to help her find it. She must have done so because by the next day, she found her pencil case.

Some days after that, we were having a difficult time at work with stiff deadline and the account we were working on just wouldn’t balance. We checked everything possible, nothing seemed to be the solution.

I went to bed that night thinking about the situation. While on my bed, I whispered a short prayer asking God to take control. The next morning, an idea that I never would have thought of myself came to me and like that the problem was solved.

My colleague, who I’d been working with, went on praising me for being so smart. I laughed and told her it wasn’t me but prayers.

In all these, I saw how wrong I had been for thinking some things were too little to bother God with or to thank Him for.

God is actually interested in even the tiniest facet of our lives. I mean, if He can be bothered enough to know the number of hair on our heads, why not other ‘little’ things in our lives?

If only we would come to God with all our issues, He is more than willing to hear; not just to hear but also solve every one of them according to His will.